London has provided me with much edification and entertainment over the years.

If I’m feeling uninspired or culturally bereft, I go to London. I’ve stood underneath the giant blue whale in the Natural History Museum, drooled over Hollywood’s most famous costumes at the V&A, and barged small children out of the way to get to the hands-on section in the Science Museum. Every visit lights up the old grey matter, and I leave feeling just that little bit more intelligent than I did when I went in.

Apart from when I went to the British Museum to see the Elgin Marbles.

I like marbles. I used to collect them. I was intrigued to see what the Ancient Greeks were doing with a load of marbles. So I dutifully followed the signs and found myself in a vast hall. I looked around. I couldn’t see any marbles. Thinking perhaps I’d come into the wrong room, I asked the room attendant where the Elgin Marbles were.

He looked at me as if I’d just asked him where my face was and, after a few disbelieving seconds, he said, ‘Er… they’re all around you.’

I followed his sweeping hand gesture, and immediately realised that the enormous slabs of marble that covered every inch of wall space were, in fact, the Elgin Marbles.

I thanked him, and scurried away, cursing my imbecilic brain, and imagining the derogatory things he would say about me on his tea break.

I’ve also had a lot of silly nocturnal banter in London. Clubs, bars, pubs – you’re spoilt for choice. A night out in London, whether it’s poshing it up in a hotel bar, or slumming it in a dingy pub, always turns out silly. Like when I became drunkenly overwhelmed by the superfluously tall cubicle doors in the St Martin’s Lane Hotel’s toilets. Or when I went to steady myself against a sturdy white wall in the Green Carnation gay club on Greek Street, which turned out to be a sheet concealing a vast empty space. Del Boy had nothing on me.

And the time my friends and I piled too many of us into a cab, and I spent the entire journey with my head hanging out the window like a dog, and my bottom in a lucky chum’s face.

Then there’s food. I love food. London has food. I love London for this.

I love that I can nibble on crustless sandwiches as delicate as an angel’s wings in the Ritz (okay, this has only happened once), and gorge disgustingly on slabs of bread and cheese in Gordon’s Wine Bar (this has happened more than once) all in the same city.

I’ve eaten probably one of my top three meals ever in a tiny, nondescript Italian that I can’t even remember the name of down an anonymous sidestreet behind Piccadilly Circus. It was about the size of a corridor, with only four tables and no other customers, and the owner and waiting staff were watching the World Cup on TV. But it serves the best chicken arrabiata in the world.

We sat, drank wine and watched the football with the owner – and when we finally left four hours later, we couldn’t remember why we’d come into London in the first place.

As for Borough Market. Well. Borough Market does something to me. Every time I venture into its labyrinthine core, I end up in a food-induced trance in front of a pile of octopus and squid, or a heap of cakes and brownies, or a mountain of steaming, boulderous pies. It’s more than a little embarrassing.

One of my favourite things to do in London is wander. I found myself in Whitechapel once, drawn there because I expected to find it smog-filled, and teeming with men in tall hats, and ladies of the night in red velvet bodices under gas lamps. I wanted to feel for myself the threat of having my internal organs ripped out by a mysterious shadowy figure.

It’s not like that at all. It’s got some market stalls and some traffic. That’s it. This life is full of disappointments.

I’ve wandered along South Bank, past the Globe, crossed London Bridge, climbed the Monument, gazed over the City, and meandered down the Strand, finally taking a sneaky toilet break in the men’s of an old pub (too desperate to find the ladies’).

I once wandered so far that I found myself at Cambridge Heath (where the ruddy heck is Cambridge Heath?), jumped on a passing train, and ended up at Liverpool Street, from where I drifted to Brick Lane and had a chicken korma shoved in my face by a man who informed me I was his daughter (I wasn’t).

You can lose yourself in London. I lost myself one day, not long after I graduated, and had entered the post-university period of disillusionment. I woke up filled with a sudden fiery motivation, and stormed up to White City to demand that the BBC give me some work experience (such is the profundity of post-university disillusionment).

I got there, stood in front of the vast, 1984-style building, looked at the blank 1984-type faces of the name-tagged BBC employees swarming around in their regimental droves – and bottled it.

And what can one do on a Tuesday afternoon in London, when one has come crashing down from the ecstasy of misguided motivation and realised she’s destined to a life of bar work?

Find a pub, of course.

I spent the rest of the afternoon sitting in a function room with a 90-year-old drunk and a one-eyed cat, and drank a lot of wine.

But it worked. I woke up the next morning returned to the nice safe feeling of disillusionment, and got the hell on with it.

London is what you make of it. Whatever you need it for – from bright lights and sparkle, to quiet corners and cosy firesides, to endless pavements and the promise of something new around the next corner. It will give you a knowing wink and murmur, ‘Come on in. I’m all yours.’

See what else Becky has to say at beckysaysthings.wordpress.com
@sparklybeck

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Hampstead Heath
Open 365 days a year, the open-water facilities on Hampstead Heath are truly unique. Since the 1800s, North Londoners have enjoyed a dip in the three wooded ponds, and today they are just as refreshing – if a little chilly (around 12^oC at the moment). The Men’s Pond has a springboard and a fenced nudist enclosure, while the Ladies’ Pond has the clearest water thanks to its close proximity to the natural springs. The Mixed Pond is usually the busiest – and murkiest – particularly on hot summer days. Also nearby is Parliament Hill Lido, a Grade II-listed unheated open-air pool, plus a paddling pool for under-fives.
Cost: £2 (£1 concession)
Nearest station: Kentish Town

Tooting Bec Lido
At just over 90m, Tooting Bec Lido is the UK’s largest outdoor freshwater pool. During the summer months, the Lido is open to the public (to swim in winter you must be a member of the South London Swimming Club). With its brightly coloured changing huts, and clear, turquoise water, the pool has been a hugely popular South London hangout since it was built back in 1906.
Cost: £3.80-£6.20
Nearest station: Tooting Bec

Marshall Street Leisure Centre
Reopened in 2010 after a 13-year, £11 million restoration project, the original 1930s Marshall Street Baths have become a stunning modern leisure centre in the heart of London’s West End. Natural light pours in through the glass ceiling on to the beautifully restored marble-lined 30m fitness pool, which hosts various timetabled sessions including SwimFit, Swim for Women and Fun Swim.
Cost: £5.70
Nearest station: Oxford Circus

Serpentine Lido
From May to September, this corner of the Serpentine lake in Hyde Park is open to the public to swim in its unheated and unchlorinated waters – sometimes with the occasional duck or swan. There is also a gated, chlorinated paddling pool for kids.
Cost: £4 (£3 concession; £1 children)
Nearest station: Hyde Park Corner

Clapham Leisure Centre 
Located just off the high street, the multimillion-pound Clapham Leisure Centre opened in January last year. The main 25m pool has a moveable floor, which allows the pool to be split into two sections so that lessons can be held alongside general swimming. There is also a 13m teaching pool, with a moveable floor that adjusts the depth of the pool to suit ability of the swimmers.
Cost: £4.10
Nearest station: Clapham Common, Clapham North

And if you need to refuel after your swim, try one of our favourite places in London for afternoon tea.

Image: Stuart Free

Believed to have originated as far back as the 17th century, the first record of phrases was published in A Dictionary of Modern Slang, Cant and Vulgar Words by John Camden Hotten. Cockneys are renowned for their quick and eloquent wit, as well as their gift for nicknaming and coining phrases. As a result, rhyming slang has now spread far beyond the sound of Bow Bells.

To help enrich this funny and fascinating slice of the English language, we decided to coin a few modern phrases of our own. So me old muckers, put up your plates, make yourself a cup of rosy and feast your mince pies on the dickie birds below. We’re sure you’ll agree that they’re the Jackson Pollack’s – and if you don’t, well quite frankly you can get out of my pub!

True cockneys hardly ever use the full rhyme, so see if you can guess what we’re referring to (answers below)…

For example: ‘We went to Brick Lane for a Ruby.’
= Ruby Murray = curry

1.
‘I just need to dock my hunger.’
‘I just need to dock my ten-mile.’
‘I just need to dock my Third.’

2.
‘Would you like any flap?’
‘Would you like any toast?’
‘Would you like any dental?’

3.
‘I don’t know, look it up on French.’
‘I don’t know, look it up on apple’
‘I don’t know, look it up on pot.’

4.
‘He was trending on Twitter with his own hand.’
‘He was trending on Twitter with his own jet.’
‘He was trending on Twitter with his own union.’

5.
‘Why don’t you take the Rubik’s?’
‘Why don’t you take the Latin?’

6.
‘I did send it, check your Will.’
‘I did send it, check your West.’
‘I did send it, check your razor.’

7.
‘After work, I hit the Fat.’
‘After work, I hit the sink.’

***********************

Answers:
1.
Hunger strike
Ten-mile hike
Third Reich
= Boris Bike

2.
Flapjack
Toast rack
Dental plaque
= cashback

3.
French poodle
Apple strudel
Pot noodle
= Google

4.
Handbag
Jet lag
Union flag
= hashtag

5.
Rubik’s cube
Latin groove
= Tube

6.
Will.i.am
West Ham
Razor clam
= spam

7.
Fatboy Slim
Sink or swim
= gym

For more on Cockney Rhyming Slang, try these links:
Cockney dictionary, translator and blog
‘Don’t get your Alans in a twist’, Mind your language blog, guardian.co.uk
‘Londoners baffled by Cockney rhyming slang’, The Telegraph

Image: Patricia Niven

In January, London Underground celebrated its 150th anniversary. From the joyous morning commute to visiting friends at the weekend, the Tube is integral to almost every Londoners life: every year, the network carries 1.107 billion passengers between more than 200 stations, and each individual train travels a total of around 114,500 miles.

So, to celebrate the Tube’s rich history, we’ve taken a look at how the stations near the Sunday office came to have their present names…

Southwark
A stone bridge was built here over the Thames, probably by the Romans in AD43, which was named ‘Suthriganawoerc’ in the 10th century – meaning ‘fort of the men of Surrey’. However, in the Doomsday book, it was recorded as ‘Sudwerca’ – meaning ‘southern defensive work or fort’ from the old English. Opened in November 1999, this station is connected to the Jubilee line.

Borough
The Romans founded a settlement here, and built a ‘high street’ as an approach road to London Bridge. Although the word ‘borough’ means ‘a fortified place’, it also refers to a district that is an administrative unit. In the late Middle Ages, this district was the only London Borough outside the city wall sending its own representative to parliament, and it has kept its name ever since. The Tube station here opened in December 1890.

London Bridge
London, recorded as Londinuum c115, is a Celtic place-name, probably formed from a personal name Londinos, meaning ‘the bold one’. Around the site of the current London Bridge, there have been many bridges over the Thames throughout the course of history – the first thought to have been built in the year 43. The poem that begins ‘London Bridge is falling down’ is thought to refer to the battle in 1014 between England’s King Aethelred and the Danes, after which the bridge collapsed. London Bridge Tube station opened in February 1900.

Blackfriars
This area, in the southwest corner of the City of London, takes its name from the colour of the habits worn by the friars of a Dominican monastery, which was established in the 13th century. The station was built on the site of Chatham Place, named in the honour of William Pitt, the first Earl of Chatham, and opened in May 1870.

So, whether you love or hate the Tube, you can’t deny that it boasts a wealth of history, and that it’s vital to maintaining the smooth running of our capital (well, most of the time…)

Click here for more interesting Tube trivia

Source: What’s in a Name?: Origins of Station Names on the London Underground by Cyril M. Harris

For our Baselworld Brand Book, Perou photographed a selection of the great and the good from the watch and jewellery world, including Marc A. Hayek (Breguet, Blancpain and Jaquet Droz) and Jean-Christophe Babin (TAG Heuer). The shots form a series of revealing black and white portraits of some of the industry’s leading figures. The intimate images feature in the Baselworld Brand Book 2013, with additional shots of each subject available on the iPad app version.

Clockwise from top left: Stephen Webster, Roberto Coin, Marc A. Hayek (Breguet, Blancpain and Jaquet Droz), Ulrich Herzog (Oris), Cindy Livingston (Guess/Gc Watches) and Jean-Christophe Babin (TAG Heuer).

Stuart’s answer was so interesting that we felt it deserved a post of its own – and, frankly, in respect of the enormity of the event he’s remembering.

‘The death of The People’s Princess, Jacko’s unfortunate overdose, the glorious spectacle of Danny Boyle’s Olympics opener… each unforgettable in its own right. But the day that left the most indelible mark on my mind will always be 9/11. Not so much because of where I was when I first found out (taking a casual mid-morning drive through the rain-slicked streets of Pietermaritzburg in KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa, with the radio on), but because of where I worked.

Imagine being a sub on the night desk of a daily broadsheet when one of the biggest news stories in a generation breaks – a story that will fundamentally redefine how the world thinks and works. And imagine an office full of weary, bleary-eyed reporters, editors and designers scrabbling to hit a midnight deadline – when an in-depth special report on the tragic events of the day will run alongside the regular news output. Folks who, as the day progresses, are privy to an increasingly startling barrage of facts and supposition firing off the news wires – but who have not personally had a moment to reflect on the horror.

To this day I can’t quite articulate the atmosphere of that bizarre, frenzied day – a mingling of adrenaline-fuelled work ethic, shock… and sadness. Suffice it to say that, paper safely dispatched to the printers, I finally stumbled home at 1am – and got outrageously drunk.’

The Baselworld Brand Book will be launched and distributed at Baselworld 2013, one of the world’s largest watch and jewellery shows, which runs from 25 April to 2 May. Written by well-known watch and jewellery journalists, the book is a fascinating guide to the industry, as well as a beautiful memento of the show.

The book is divided into three sections. The first, Faces, features interviews with around 60 leading figures in the industry. Accompanied by beautiful portraits, some exclusively shot, these interviews form a unique who’s who of the watch and jewellery world. The second, Brands, provides an insight into more than 200 of the brand names, big and small, at the show. The final part, Trends, explores the themes that are shaping the industry now and will be in the years ahead.

Readers can also view the book online and via the Baselworld Brand Book iPad app. Both electronic versions include four exclusive videos, featuring some of the biggest names in the watch and jewellery industry.

It’s an exciting year for Baselworld and we’re proud to play our part.

5. Noah takes a photo of himself every day for 6 years
At nearly 6 minutes this one requires patience but watching poor old Noah get well… fat and old is both terrifying and addictive. Nearly 25 million people agree.

6. Magnetic putty
In a scene straight out of the 1958 horror flick “The Blob,” this shows a lump of magnetic silly putty completely engulfing a magnet. Creepy but cool.

7. Move
The shortest distance between two points is a straight line. Especially when that 44 day, 38,000 kilometre ‘line’ is edited into a one minute video and the guy is seriously cute. One for the ladies.

8. The Mountain
I caved to another schmaltzy (panpipe-like) montage but I figure we all need a bit of a lift after watching the depressing process of ageing in video number five.

9. Latitude festival
Not into festivals? Me either. But this catchy little video almost makes me want leave the comfort of my sofa and share toilets with millions of other people… Almost!